Sunday, October 10, 2010

Comfort

Being in Utah without Bob was hard. My family was really great, but it was hard to basically be Ezra's sole emotional support. I gained a whole new appreciation for single parents, and I even had a lot of help. So when Bob called to break the news that he had developed a new medical condition that could turn out really bad (although the chances are super low) and that it would require us putting off having kids for a little while, I was feeling really weighed down by everything. It was nice to have family around to talk about it with, but really hard to not have Bob there to comfort me.

When fast Sunday rolled around I was really seeking for some answers. I was actually a little surprised that they came as quickly as the opening hymn. We sang "I Know that My Redeemer Lives" and the second verse contained my much needed answer. "He lives to calm my troubled heart. He lives all blessing to impart." I may not know exactly how things are going to turn out, but I know that I can trust in Jesus Christ and that through his Atonement he is able to comfort me through my trials. As hard as it was for me to accept the fact that more kids would have to wait, I know that He does indeed live "all blessings to impart" and that I will be blessed with more children. I am sure that in a couple of years from now, this will seem like such a small thing, but I am truly grateful for the knowledge that my Heavenly Father knows me personally. That He cares about what is important to me now, and that He will help me through anything. I am so grateful for the Gospel and the knowledge and comfort that it brings into my life. I am also grateful for my sweet and loving brother who fasted for me and Bob even though I had not asked him to, I know that it helped me find the answers I needed. Thank You!

6 comments:

Charmayne said...

This sounds all too familiar. I remember when Doug was diagnosed with MS and all the unknowns. I was pretty upset. But when Bruce gave Doug a blessing it comforted me as well. Like you said, on my own Doug's health condition can be pretty scary. But when I remember to put it in the Lords Hands everything is fine and I am reassured that all will be well. We love you guys!

Lisa said...

Thanks for sharing your testimony. It brought a tear to my eye and warmed my heart. I love that song and it will always hold a special place in my heart. When Rich and I were struggling and going through the adoption process that song always gave me peace, comfort, and strength. I could never sing it all the way through because of the very verse you are referring to. I always (and often still do) get choked up and so overwhelmed with the love of the Savior that I can't finish singing. I know Heavenly Father loves you. I know the Savior knows your pain and can give you the comfort you need. I am also grateful for the gospel and know that my faith is what got me through some tough times. I can't say I know exactly what you are feeling, but I know through your faith you will be lifted up, comforted, and carried when neccessary. We love you! If you guys need anything please give us a call. We miss you and can't wait to see you again.

Please give Ezra a hug and kiss from Ava. She loves to look at pictures of him on the blog.

Anne said...

I am so impressed and inspired by your handling of difficult situations. I'm sure that your testimony and strength will help you to weather the storm.

We are going to the temple on Friday and we will make a special effort to think of you guys.

We are a little bummed that we won't see you guys at Christmas but are SO excited that you will soon be a lot closer.

Melenie said...

Oh, I hope everything turns out okay for you! Love ya.

Danika said...

I feel like you and I have been living parallel lives lately. We were both away from our husbands, in Utah with family, had a child with a broken wrist and are working through what life is handing us right now. I can truly say I empathize with you. I'm also incredibly grateful for you and your faith. This post really boosted my own testimony and I think I can face another day with a little more strength. Love you guys!

Steve and Sherrie said...

That was inspiring. Thank you for sharing. You've been in our prayers. Love you!